We just had a near-life experience, fellas.
Give me a second. I have to clean up my drool and try to get my jaw back into place. Wow, thank you Pietra Ferrari. Thank your parents for me, too. For creating you.
But I digress. Let’s get down to brass tax. It’s time for yet another edition of my weekly post How-Much-Sex-Does-It-Take-To-Sell-You-Booze? This week, we’ll be tackling this lovely ad for Bavaria Beer. Now, I hadn’t heard of Bavaria before, but you can bet your bottom dollar I won’t be forgetting it anytime soon.
You can’t help but be drawn in from the first second, and it doesn’t even take a raging hot sexpot like Pietra to do it; it’s all about atmosphere. The beach setting is a great selling point for beer, because we have come to associate a cold beer as being refreshing on a hot day – and where is it hot? A beach. So we set the mood of a hot day right off the bat. And look at all the blues; it seems to be a common theme in alcohol ads. I feel as though blue is a staple color for its soothing quality, and it is easy to incorporate it into a beach setting.
The two guys in the frame look like two regular dudes, and we see regular dude #1 reach into a bucket of ice (getting that refreshing feeling yet?) and pull up a bottle of Bavaria. As this happens, hot diggidy, Pietra makes her way out of the water. Then we have a minute of play; the man moves the bottle and Pietra follows suit. I don’t even have to go into my speech about the beautiful model and the sex appeal, I think we get it by now. And we love it. Or at least I love it.
But what we are seeing is that Bavaria has some kind of power over women – they love it, they’ll be under some kind of trance if you bust out a bottle of it. Someone get me some Bavaria. A whole friggin’ case. I’ll keep some in my back pocket in case of emergencies. “What’s your name, girl?” “Go away, assh – hey is that Bavaria in your pocket?”
Then we have regular dude #1 peeling off the label. And my heart jumped to my throat. But she doesn’t fall for it. So what did we learn? That Bavaria won’t turn a girl into a slut; it’ll just give you an edge you otherwise didn’t have.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some “research” to do on a one Ms. Pietra Ferrari. Vroom vroom, baby.
I don’t understand why people think beer is so refreshing on a hot day. in my humble opinion, beer tastes far worse than water, soda, or juice when it gets warm – and that’s bound to happen when you’re drinking it on a beach.
also, the general dehydration thing.
A guy’s fantasy come true. Well almost.